When Is It Time to Call a Teacher?

These Steps Usually Work:

Teens may face a wide variety of problems at school, but the same step-by-step approach usually helps to solve most of them.

 1. Talk calmly with your child. Ask questions and listen quietly. Often the solution will become clear just by talking about the problem.

2. Talk with the teacher or teachers involved. Encourage your teen to initially try to work out the problem on his own. Remind him to listen politely to the teacher, and explain his views. Neither you or your child should be concerned with assigning blame. Instead, concentrate on finding a solution. If the student-teacher meeting is unsuccessful, then consider asking for a parent-teacher-student meeting.

3. Talk with your school principal. If you and your teen and the teachers cannot find a good solution, ask to meet with your Assistant Principal. The principal will add yet another perspective and lots of experience with student problems. A calm, courteous discussion is almost sure to produce a solution agreeable to everyone. If not, the principal can advise you about next steps you can consider.

Sometimes parents wonder if they should “bother” a teacher with a problem. “Should I just keep quiet and hope for the best?” they wonder.

Teachers say they want to know what’s going on in their students’ lives-and the earlier the better. Chances are if you’ve noticed a problem, your teen’s teachers have probably seen it, too.

With any problem, it’s usually best to start by contacting the teacher involved. Here are three times when you should definitely call the teacher:

1. Grades drop. Whether it’s in one subject, or in all of them, a dramatic drop (more than one letter grade) indicates there’s trouble.

2. You suspect your teen may be telling you things that aren’t true. When, day after day, your teen says there’s no homework-but other parents say their kids have assignments-you want to get the real story.

3. There’s been a change in your family. A new marriage, a divorce, a serious illness or a move can all affect school performance.